I hope it wasn’t you who sent me this

So you expect results and feedback from your email blast? Then maybe you should formulate the email a bit differently from this (something I just received today):

Important News From XYZ Co.

Do Not Reply @ xyz.com

[opening paragraph]
Dear Kimmo,
We have an exciting update about…


First, “Important News” and your company name. What makes you think you can determine whether it’s important for me? And why should your company name add to the excitement? Maybe give some kind of more tangible incentive for me to open?

Second, “Do Not Reply” as the sender name. You just might achieve that. In all forms.

Third, “We have an exciting update…”. Exciting for whom? You, no doubt. Me, I’m not so sure. Why not tell me up front and let me decide?

The rest of the email goes on in the “we” spirit. Okay, in the fifth paragraph there are a couple of “yous”, but does your average reader go that far to discover if there might be something for her?

Come on, you can do better than that.

(If you’re interested, there’s more about the same issue here: Marketers—a breed alienated from real life?)


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